Still Faking It

Tell him while you’re still in it

Six weeks is long enough that he thinks he’s cracked the code and short enough that you can still rewrite it without it feeling like a formal review. The bathroom finish is doing two jobs at once: it keeps the peace in the moment and it teaches him that whatever he just did was plenty. Stop outsourcing the last bit. Next time you’re close, keep his hand or his mouth exactly where it is and say something short and filthy instead of the usual performance. “Stay there, that’s the bit” or “slower, right there, don’t stop” works better than a whole explanation. Men hear instructions in the middle of sex as encouragement far more often than they hear them as criticism, especially if your voice is already a bit wrecked. You’re not giving a TED talk. You’re pointing at the good bit while it’s still happening.

If the hand-guiding made him freeze, try words first and touch second. Plenty of blokes go stiff the second a woman moves them because they’ve been told off for being too rough or not rough enough in the past and now every adjustment feels like a fail. So start with your mouth. Tell him you want to show him something, then put his fingers where you need them and keep talking. “Just there, yeah, circle it like that” while you grind against his hand is harder to misread as a complaint. Make the instruction sound like a request you’re enjoying, not a correction you’re enduring. If he still hesitates, laugh and say you’ve got a very specific spot and you’re going to make him find it. Turn the whole thing into a game instead of a test. Most of them will play along once they realise you’re not about to grade them.

The “was it good” question is where a lot of this dies. You’ve already trained him that the answer is yes. Next time he asks, try “it was close, want me to show you the last bit?” then actually show him. Climb on, or pull his hand back, or flip over and talk him through it while he watches. Plenty of men get harder from watching you finish than from being told they failed. You’re not taking the job off him forever. You’re giving him the map while the lights are still on. Once he’s seen what works he can do it himself next time without you having to narrate every second. The goal is to get the information into the room while everyone’s still naked and interested, not later when you’re both dressed and the mood’s gone.

If direct talk still feels too heavy, use the afterglow. Once you’ve both come (properly, not performed), tell him you want to do that again but with one change. Be specific and a bit rude about it. “Next time keep your tongue flat when I push your head down” or “I come harder if you stay inside and use your fingers at the same time.” Frame it as something you want more of, not something he got wrong. Men who like you will usually chase the thing that makes you louder. The ones who sulk because you asked for a different angle were never going to be worth the bathroom trip anyway. You can keep the flirty tone the whole way through. Call him greedy for making you wait, tell him you’re going to ruin him once he learns the spot, bite his shoulder while you explain. None of that kills the vibe. It just stops you having to finish the job alone with the bathroom light on and the extractor fan humming.

Six weeks of faking is already a habit. Break it once while you’re still in the bed and the next few times get easier. He either gets better at it or he reveals he preferred the performance. Either way you stop wasting the good bits on the other side of a locked door. Tell him what you want while your legs are still around him. Then make him stay there until you’re actually done.